Passover Reminder         April 7, 1998

It's almost time for the Holidays.  Remember those folks 
from the Purim story?  Well, they are at it again!  Mordecai 
came to Esther at the end of the Megillah and told her he's 
got good news and bad news.  The good news is:  She's 
saved, and won't be murdered by Haman.  The bad news 
is:  Next month, she's got to make Pesach!!

Well, the "Next month" is here!  Oy vey....

LadyHawke
*~*~*~*~*~*

"Rabbi-engineer?"

Bernie, a young Jewish boy, decided he wanted to be an aeronautical
engineer and build airplanes.   Over the years he studied hard, went
to the best schools, and finally got his degree.   It didn't take long
before he gained a reputation as the finest aeronautical engineer in
all the land, so he decided to start his own company to build jets.

His company was such a hit that the President of the United States
called Bernie into his office.  "Bernie," the president said, "the
President of Israel wants to commission your company to build an
advanced jet fighter for his country.  You have our approval  --  go 
out and design him the best jet fighter ever made."

Needless to say, Bernie was tremendously excited at this prospect. 
The entire resources of his company went into building the most
advanced jet fighter in history.  Everything looked terrific on paper,
but when they held the first test flight of the new jet, disaster
struck.  The wings couldn't take the strain--they broke clean off of
the fuselage! (The test pilot parachuted to safety, thank G-d.) 
Bernie was devastated;  his company redesigned the jet fighter, but
the same thing happened at the next test flight--the wings broke off
again.

Beside himself with worry, Bernie went to his Schul to pray  -  to ask
G-d where he had gone wrong.  The rabbi saw Bernie's sadness, 
and naturally asked him what the matter was.  Bernie decided to 
pour his heart out to the rabbi.  

After hearing the problem with the jet fighter, the rabbi put his arm
on Bernie's shoulder and told him, "Listen, I know how to solve your
problem. All you have to do is drill a row of holes directly above and
below where the wing meets the fuselage.  If you do this, I absolutely
guarantee the wings won't fall off."

Bernie just smiled and thanked the rabbi for his advice  -  but the more 
he thought about it, the more he realized he had nothing to lose. 
Maybe the rabbi had some holy insight.  So Bernie did exactly what 
the rabbi told him to do.  On the next design of the jet fighter, they
drilled a row of holes directly above and below where the wings met
the fuselage.  And  -  it worked!! The next test flight went perfectly! 

Brimming with joy, Bernie went to the Schul to tell the rabbi that his
advice had worked.  "Naturally," said the rabbi, "I never doubted it
would." 

"But Rabbi, how did you know that drilling the holes would prevent 
the wings from falling off?"

"Bernie," the rabbi intoned, "I'm an old man.  I've lived for many,
many years and I've celebrated Passover many, many times.  And
in all those years, not once  --  NOT ONCE  --  has the matzoh
broken on the perforation!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dictionary:
Matzoh is a brittle, flat piece of unleavened bread, eaten especially 
during Passover.   
Passover (Pesach) is a Jewish Holiday beginning on the 14th of 
Nisan and traditionally continuing for eight days, commemorating 
the Exodus of the Jews from Egypt.  (Old Testament, my friends...)