Important Notice         April 1, 1998

This notice was forwarded to me from 
JD STONE {jstone@EMH1.LEAD.ARMY.MIL}.  I realize 
that not everyone is aware of the workings of the Internet, 
so I have decided to forward this to you, my subscribers, 
as a public service.  

LadyHawke
*~*~*~*~*~*

-----------------------------text-of-forwarded-message-------------------
To: LadyHawke@Unforgettable.com
From: JD STONE {jstone@EMH1.LEAD.ARMY.MIL}
Subject: Internet Maintenance [it is that time of year again]

LadyHawke,

Here's a copy of the notice we received from MIT.  Please 
alert your subscribers.  We are trying to avoid the problems 
we had last year.  Thanks for helping us out.

JD Stone

------------------------------------------------
To: All Internet Users
From: Kim Dereksen
      Interconnected Network Maintenance staff
      Main branch, Massachusetts Institute of Technology
Subject:  Internet Cleaning

PLEASE PASS THIS NOTICE TO OTHER USERS WHO 
MAY NOT SEE IT!

As many of you know, each year the Internet must be shut down 
for 24 hours in order to allow us to clean it.  The cleaning process, 
which eliminates dead e-mail and inactive ftp, www and gopher 
sites, allows for a better-working and faster Internet.

This year, the cleaning process will take place from 12:01 a.m.
GMT on April 1 until 12:01 a.m. GMT on April 2.  During that
24-hour period, five very powerful Japanese built multi-lingual
Internet-crawling robots (Toshiba ML-2274) situated around the
world will search the Internet and delete any data that they find.

In order to protect your valuable data from deletion we ask that
you do the following:

1. Disconnect all terminals and local area networks from their
   Internet connections.
2. Shut down all Internet servers, or disconnect them from the
   Internet.
3. Disconnect all disks and hard drives from any connections to 
   the Internet.
4. Refrain from connecting any computer to the Internet in any
   way.
5. Avoid placing operating microwave ovens or toaster/toaster
   ovens near your computer modem.
6. Avoid wearing nylon (or other dielectric fiber) undergarments
   because of the possibility of electrical discharge.

We understand the inconvenience that this may cause some 
Internet users, and we apologize.  However, we are certain that 
any inconvenience will be more than made up for by the 
increased speed and efficiency of the Internet, once it has been 
cleared of electronic flotsam and jetsam.

We thank you for your cooperation.
Kim Dereksen
Interconnected Network Maintenance staff
Main branch, Massachusetts Institute of Technology


Sysops and others:  Since the last Internet cleaning, the 
number of Internet users has grown dramatically.  Please 
assist us in alerting the public of the upcoming Internet 
cleaning by posting this message where your users will be 
able to read it.  Please pass this message on to other sysops 
and Internet users as well.

Thank you.



                         A P R I L   F O O L S ! ! !

{hehehe}  I had you there for a while, didn't I?  {g}

For those of you unfamiliar with the American tradition of April Fools 
Day, the first of April is a day when many people play practical jokes 
on others.  This being a joke list, it seems to be very appropriate to 
play a practical joke on my subscribers.  Sorry....  I couldn't resist it.

Thanks to JD STONE {jstone@EMH1.LEAD.ARMY.MIL} for the 
joke.  It was found on the UGA Humorlist.  To subscribe send an 
e-mail to:  listserv@uga.cc.uga.edu leave the subject area blank; 
in the BODY of the letter, type: SUB HUMOR yourfirstname 
yourlastname