A Christmas Tradition...       Dec 28, 1997

Didn't you always want to know why we put little angels on top of our Christmas trees.....

LadyHawke
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Version I

It was supposed to be a happy time, but it wasn't. Santa was really cross. It was Christmas eve and NOTHING was going right. Mrs. Claus had burned all the Christmas cookies. The Elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime they had put in while making toys, and the reindeer had been drinking all afternoon and were dead drunk. To make matters worse, they had taken the sleigh out for a spin earlier in the day and crashed it into a tree, breaking off one of the runners.

Santa was beside himself with anger. "I can't believe it! I've got to deliver millions of presents all over the world in just a few hours from now and all my reindeer are drunk, my Elves are on strike, and I don't even have a Christmas tree! I sent that stupid little angel out HOURS ago to find a tree and he isn't even back yet! What am I going to do??"

Just then the little angel opened the front door and stepped in from the snowy night, draggin a Christmas tree. He says "Yo, Santa, where do ya want me to stick the Christmas tree this year???"

And thus, the tradition of Angels perched on top of the Christmas trees came to pass.......
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Version II

Why we put little angels on top of our Christmas trees.....

Not long ago and far away, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip... but there were problems everywhere. Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out heaven-knows-where. More stress. Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys all over the place.

Frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whiskey. When he opened the cupboard, he found the elves had hit the liquor and there was nothing strong to drink. He decided to have a cup of coffee, but in his frustration, he dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor.

He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw it was made from. Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed on his way to the door. He opened the door and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said: "Where would you like to put this tree Santa?"

And that my friend, is how the little angel came to be on top of the Christmas tree.

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Version III

T'was the night before Christmas, Santa was a wreck...
The Elves were on strike for a bigger paycheck.
Four reindeer had a bad case of the flu ,
And the IRS wanted a piece of him too.

His wife, Mrs. Clause, suffered with PMS,
And scolded him soundly, which caused him distress.
Then all of a sudden, at the front door
Came a very loud knock, and then nothing more

Santa stormed over all red in the face,
And flung open the door at a furious pace.
There stood an angel as pretty as can be,
And she said: "Hey Fat boy, where should I put this tree?"